i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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