So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I need to calm my uterus...
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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