Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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