Pants 0. Shit 1.
there's paper in my vomit.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i used baking grease as lip gloss
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
