You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
