So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
