hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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