Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Randomize