I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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