goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
