We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
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Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
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im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.