How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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