he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
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Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
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Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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