This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
