So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize