Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
