I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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