my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
