butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
