it was like his penis was on wheels.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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