weddingsv make me drug and hornr
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
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