Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
