Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
