i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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