Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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