why didn't you poke me back
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
