Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
