I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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