he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Pants are for mortals
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
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