Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
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he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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