I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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