i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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