He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Randomize
