Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
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