you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize