just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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