everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
