Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize