i just made my gag reflex go away.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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