In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
The air was thick with penises
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
