Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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