Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize