You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
