She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
