For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
