Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
