I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize