it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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