Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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