even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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